The last video I made on my YouTube channel, “The Glamorous Truth of Being a Digital Nomad”, exposed some of my true feelings about working and travelling. No shower curtains, no toilet seats, feeling at-home nowhere, were just some of the qualms that I struggled with. But not long after, I got fed up, came back to Berlin, got an apartment and basked in the good life of stability and belongingness.
Being a digital nomad and getting into travel blogging was a dream for the past two years, but when I actually went all in and did it, it didn’t live up to my expectations.
One of the tipping points for me was when I was on Insta trying to find (which was most likely followed up by copious editing) the perfect photo of myself with some exotic background. I remember having a repulsive, snot-heavy cold at the time, feeling like utter hell, and thinking “I am so fucking fake” as my nose dripped mucus all over my cell phone. This illustrates just how “glammed up” everything is on these social media channels - and how we all fall for everyone’s bullshit.
A lot of it was fun, don’t get me wrong, the weird weekends road tripping around Albania, eating Tzatziki like a king in Santorini, blah blah. But the truth is, it all felt superficial. I was just living my current existence in yet another country - problems still in full force, bouts of emptiness and anxiety common. And I hate to break it to you, but fancy capuccinos don’t differ that much country to country, café to café.
So I decided its time to move on from that phase in my life. I will still travel, but this is my opportunity to pivot the Hopeless Roamantic a bit - in the direction of real life, pursuing entrepreneurship, spreading kindness, finding deeper meaning in things, dealing with mental health struggles, living a greener existence, and more. If that sounds totally not niche, that’s because I am confused as fuck right now about life, but I am okay with that for now. I am sure my old love for travel will peak through at points, but my goal to become a travel influencer is long gone and has been replaced with something unforseen, but better.